What a fool!

This week has been crappy for me (Melissa). I am stuck in the beginnings of a long trial. Heightened security is everywhere. Anxiety is everywhere, and pumping wildly through my veins. I have long days ahead of me, as it is assumed that this trial will run through next week ... and I am as backed up as I've ever been in my entire career.

I sit in the courtroom, going over and over in my head which door to run to if something "goes wrong" ... all while wondering when the judge's pickle jar will finally overflow and when his belly button will start burrowing a hole through his spine.

I looked around to friends of the defendants ... some of who are proud, arrogant, defensive and sad. And to family of the defendants ... hopeful, shocked, ignorant. I always try to remember that these are somebody's "babies". And to the family and friends of the victims ... full of sorrow and dramatically prayerful that peace will come.

"It's been a crappy week! I am just not myself! I need a vacation!"

"Let's stop for lunch" is much like the sound of a hallelujah choir of angels to a court reporter's ears and hot diggity dog was it today!

I left. I let my sunroof open and I let the windows down. I went through Taco Hell drive-thru.

With much time to spare, I wondered where I could go and park my car to eat my fine cuisine. I wanted to go somewhere that would make me feel better ....

I went to Goodwill.

Sounds silly; doesn't it?

But all of a sudden, I didn't feel like I was having such a crappy week anymore.

I was sitting in a parking lot, not worrying at the moment that the car note for the vehicle I drove was going to be paid for this month. I was able to pay for my lunch with cash. I sat in that parking lot with nice clothes on. I had air conditioning in my car. I have a job. I have a job. I have a job!! And I don't have to go to Goodwill to find clothes that I need. I have the privilege to go to Goodwill to to see if there are any "finds", not to choose which pair of used shoes will do for a job interview.

I have a healthy child. I have a loving, big family, none of which have had their lives taken by murder. I am in good health. I have been blessed with much and forgiven much.

"To whom much is given, much is required."

Just a little reality check. And, yes, I thought so much of the enlightnment of an experiance that I took pictures. ;)